In response to Listener2’s comment: yes , you are welcomed. thanks

Dear KP, this is something from another post that I think you might find helpful. You can search through the forums for the post titled something like “Needing Support” for some other posts in that thread.

I copied this is from a book called Life 101. I thought about your post and thought this might be helpful. Definitely a goof first step in improving any situation.

Acceptance. Acceptance is such an important commodity, some have called it “the first law of personal growth.”

Acceptance is simply seeing something the way it is and saying, “That’s the way it is.”

Acceptance is not approval, consent, permission, authorization, sanction, concurrence, agreement, compliance, sympathy, endorsement, confirmation, support, ratification, assistance, advocating, backing, maintaining, authenticating, reinforcing, cultivating, encouraging, furthering, promoting, aiding, abetting or even liking what is.

Acceptance is saying, “It is what it is, and what is is what is.” Great philosophers from Gertrude Stein (A rose is a rose is a rose”) to Popeye (“I am what I am”) have understood acceptance.

Until we truly accept everything, we can not see clearly. We will always be looking through the filters of “must’s,” “should’s,” “ought-to’s,” and prejudices.

When reality confronts our notion of what reality should be, reality always wins. (Drop something while believing gravity shouldn’t make it fall. It falls anyway.) We don’t like this (that is, we have trouble accepting this), so we either struggle with reality and become upset, or turn away from it and become unconscious. If you find yourself upset or unconscious-or alternating between the two-about something, you might ask yourself, “What am I not accepting about this?”

Acceptance is not a state of passivity or inaction, We are not saying you can’t change the world, right wrongs or replace evil with good. Acceptance is, in fact, the first step to successful action.

If you don’t fully accept a situation precisely the way it is, you will have difficulty changing it. Moreover, if you don’t fully accept the situation, you will never really know if the situation should be changed.

When you accept, you relax; you let go; you become patient. This is an enjoyable (and effective) place for either participation or departure. To stay and struggle (even for fun things: how many times have you tried really hard to have a good time?), or to run away in disgust and/or fear is not the most fulfilling way to live. It is, however, the inevitable result of nonacceptance.

Take a few moments and consider a situation you are not happy with-not your greatest burden in life, just a simple event about which you feel peeved. Now accept everything about the situation. Let it be the way it is. Because, after all, it is that way, is it not? Also, if you accept it, you will feel better about it.

After accepting it, and everything about it, you probably still won’t like it, but you may stop hating and/or fearing it. At worst, you will hate it or fear it less.