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★★Thinking Rationally About Problem Behaviors

Hello and Beautiful Greetings!  :)

I’m in love with some of the ideas that I’m seeing right now about “addiction” and wanted to share some of what I’m reading.  My hope is that maybe someone else will enjoy these ideas as well!  

1 The mainstream philosophy of addiction is super disempowering. People are described as having a Disease.  Literature from that school of thought says stuff like, “Acknowedge that you are powerless over your binge eating” or whatever.  Total bullcrap really!

2. A more rational approach to problem behaviors is that our behaviors are always under our conscious control. Eating is a voluntary behavior. Gambling is a voluntary behavior. Smoking is a voluntary behavior. Exercising (or avoiding exercise) is a voluntary behavior. Ahhh, that’s much better!  :) 

3. Somebody who overdoes it in some area of their life is almost certainly giving the addictive substance or act, some magical powers that are not actually there.  Like, someone who seeks food in times of trouble, almost certainly has been telling themselves that pasta is an excellent way to distract yourself from your own fearful thoughts. Do ravioli really have a magical substance that combats fearful thoughts, or is it just a lie we’ve accepted or embraced?  Is wine really a good way to handle troubles, or are the troubles still there once the wine is in your system?

4. In any situation, there are several alternative behaviors. This is worth pointing out because anyone who has adopted the culture of addiction believes that when they are having a rough day, they HAVE to hit the donuts.  In reality, we can prove that lots of people have a rough day without ever hitting the donuts. So it is not a fact that you HAVE TO submit to bad coping mechanisms.

5. Problem spending (or problem drinking, or problem eating, or even depressive thinking) is any pattern that has kept bringing you further from your desired outcomes. If a person thinks, “I HAVE to have some pumpkin pie because my mother-in-law will be offended if I don’t”, then this person would be wise to ask whether situations like this are adding up to a pants size that is not pleasing to them.  If yes, then it is probably a pattern of problem eating. People who rationalize that they can eat THIS piece of pumpkin pie, and then work it off tomorrow, are probably missing the full chain of behaviors that makes up their problem eating. One piece of pie will not, in itself, keep you at a weight you do not like, but the ability to rationalize one piece of pie today, and another one on Thursday, is EXACTLY what has gotten us to this point.

6. “I can’t” is only true if death would ensue.  For example, if you tell yourself that you “can’t” stand going out to dinner, without ordering rich food like everyone else, ask whether you would actually DIE if you did this behavior. If death would not ensue, then that is just an exaggeration.  In reality, some behaviors might prove somewhat unpleasant (having coffee instead of birthday cake, at your daughter’s party) and others may prove slightly awkward (telling your overweight mother in law that you like her pumpkin pie but not the extra weight you carry when you eat dessert), but these things will not kill you. 

OK, those are my contributions on rational ways to think about “Addictions” without falling into mainstream nonsense.  :)

Feel free to jump in if you have any thoughts on Albert Ellis’s work (Rational Emotive Therapy), or on Jack Trimpey’s philosophies (Rational Recovery).  I’m fascinated and if anyone sees other arguments in their works, I’d love to hear them!

-BrightAngel

In response to BrightAngel's post:

Interesting. Thanks for posting

I live a completely charmed life

In response to BrightAngel's post:

Always love your thought provoking threads! Thank you, BrightAngel.

I do like Albert Ellis.

The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny. ~Albert Ellis

Albert Ellis ABC--love this

& Love your thoughts...

 

You asked for things which surface regarding topic:

I will take the thoughts a bit at a time...

In relation to any behavior- not just addictive... I think it depends on how powerlessness is defined.

If powerlessness is defined as act of surrender... that it is power-full.

It allows stepping back and the halting the energy of doing the same thing that hasn't worked.

It creates newness, a fresh beginning, and an acknowledgement of Spark within (and/or BEYOND}... how ever that is attained for each is individual.

And in regard to disease-concept... will be back on that one(:

that's all I have for the moment...

thanks for opportunity to share!

love,selfcare

 

Affirmation Quick Searchaffirmation tags
♫Frampton I love enjoying this surrender. It is always beyond my wildest imagination of completion

Did this in counselling. For EVERY negative thought about yourself, there is an unhealthy way of thinking present. These are those ways of thinking that feed your negativity and keep you in a shitty mindset. BE AWARE.

We’ll pick you up!

images?q=tbn:ANd9GcQMuwGDa89ao7bd5bGzAV4INGhn0Rqz__cJk_2ZDvH4pFxvS5Ankw

Affirmation Quick Searchaffirmation tags
♫Frampton I love enjoying this surrender. It is always beyond my wildest imagination of completion

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