★Ideas

HI All

I am interested in any tried and tested and never failed affirmations which prevent insecurity and increase self esteem, I have the horrible habit of always comparing myself to others and their achievements and their looks and never feeling good enough.

I am great in doing this for others but lousy when it comes to myself- anyone else like that?

I find accepting myself and saying affirmations like “I’m right where I’m supposed to be” assists in the ol’ comparing department.

The best measuring device we have is not comparing ourselves to someone else but using ourselves as the measuring device.

Are we better than before? Do we have our own goals? Do we have some quantitative goal (not someone) to measure ourselves against to make sure we are improving?

Whenever I stop looking at myself for improvement, and looking only for the acknowledgement of others, my personal values get lost; I get lost.

Thanks Laurie

Good advice, hopefully that helps. Guess the habit goes back to childhood, as does so many other negative self talk that goes inside us.

Guess it is a good philosophical question of whether we can ever be truly altruistic? Or do we endeavour to do things according to rewards and approval from others? Terrible and sad way to look at it.

Hi Trinity,

be sure to check out the Best Of: Confidence Affirmations thread.

I’d love to hear your thoughts and progress!

In response to Trinity’s post:
Trinity, I had learned awhile back to tell yourself any realization is WONDERFUL.

I thought of that when you wondered if we do things according to rewards and approval from others, and you said that’s a terrible and sad way to look at it.

If it’s real, and you’re doing that, than it’s WONDERFUL you recognize it.

So, while you might not like the getting approval behavior, the realization is wonderful. Once you see it, if you don’t like it, you can change anything. Believe that and the rest will happen as it needs to.

None of us are 100% of what we want to be 100% of the time. Though the more true we are to ourselves, the more we become what we want most of the time. You don’t have to be perfect. Just be perfect at being you(:

One I do when it comes to about ideas is that carry you journal everywhere you go. When you get a idea jot down that idea in your journal. This way you are not trying to kill yourself on what the idea was when you had that idea. It will help create new idea when you jot them down.

Lately I find myself saying often: “It is what it is” and that takes some worry off my mind.

In response to Linda3777’s post:
Hi Linda, LOL, about your quote. I had a boss that used to say that all of the time(: When he said it, I generally didn’t like it. It usually pertained to whatever he was doing that we didn’t like, just suck it up. But, ya know he was right, and I grew to love the quote. Acceptance is what it’s all about. I suppose that’s another example of the power in powerlessness.

“It is what it is” – I love that phrase!

I was looking for the origin on the phrase in Google when I found this page

From the page:

“It is what it is” – Used often in the business world, this incredibly versatile phrase can be literally translated as “fuck it.”

hahaha

A journal has been something I did years ago, writing poems, sayings and making up affirmations specifically to deal with whatever was going on with my life at the time. I should do it again, thanks all, your thoughts have been really interesting.

when i first started my journey of personal development i always compared myself to others because i had absolutely no self esteem; a great way to get over this was taking babysteps and comparing myself every year the how i was the year before. thats why journaling is great because when you read back on what you wrote a year ago you may find some of the insecurities you had then to be laughable

In response to se da luz’s post:
Firm believer in writing/journaling.

In responce to Trinity’s Post

First thing Trinity is you are a unique individual, just like a snow flake, you have something that no one else on this planet will ever have and that is what makes you a great person.

You need to get rid of your old beliefs and start some new ones. You are where you are suppose to be right now and when you accept that as fact you find that anything you do is good. Even when we do something that doesn’t turn out right, it is still what we had to do to finally do it right. Think of Thomas Edison, he never got it right the first time, but he always got it right.

Our beliefs have been developing in us since we were babies and sometimes we have to eliminate the ones that no longer work for us. If you would like to know more check out this Blog

I wrote it and people say it helps them, maybe it will help you also.

Love yourself always, because when you love yourself, others will love you also.

Over and over a thousand times a day “I approve of myself”….until you really FEEL it.

Yes, you’ve been told a thousand times in a thousand ways that you aren’t good enough, that it’ll be enough IF you do this or that….that I’ll love you IF you behave. So, now you have to UNTELL yourself those messages. Look yourself in the eye – in a mirror – and say it over and over.

I used to sing myself lyrics to love songs when I was REALLY working on this one.

You are marvelous – EXACTLY as you are.

Jennifer

In response to jfowler’s post:
In response to rockswealth’s post:
In response to Laurie Is Having Another Great Day~‘s post:

I noticed that this bmindfuller started this thread last year! – but its so perfect for me that you responded out of the blue. Thankyou for bringing this one back as it has been a good reminder to me of how to value oneself and never to feel ‘less than’.
It is so very important and I often dont take my own advice on this matter.
My default mode tends to find me in the ‘not good enough’ place and I quickly need to come on to this site and re-affirm in order to turn my day around before it turns ME around!

The responses are simply lovely and also a great reminder of what a wonderful support network this site really is. I only wish Trinity was still around to read your kind words! But anyway, I got a lot out of them and I’m sure others will too.