shemmy's Profile

• Leave A Comment For shemmy

hi—i’m a recent graduate from medical school. i am almost finished with my second year as a surgery resident (total residency=5 years). I work approximately 90 hours per week… Married for almost 2 years as well. Both are extremely difficult. I just filed an appeal to being “let go” from surgery when this year’s contract expires in July… somehow, I have developed a bad rep with my attendings (i.e. superiors, older men, established surgeons). Although I have been told for 1 year that they were concerned about my future because they ssid I had a tremor or performance anxiety… (late january, 2008) i recently discovered that what they were calling “anxiety/tremor” was a codeword for “not expected to become a very good surgeon.” when i asked what this means exactly I was told that my superiors feel that—>I am too scattered/unfocused/all-over-the-place.
so, my response is that i’m responseless—‘speechless.’ i will however, admit to being weary from the nonstop working…this causes me to feel lazy at times…i often feel the need for frequent, short naps (this may be normal from little sleep/rest). the napping/breaks have shaped my working style into a weird habitual cycle that takes about 2-3 hours to cycle. Up and Down, procrastinate for an hour, then run around the hospital/call 2-5 people with orders, and race thru all the little tasks that I’ve “saved-up” during the hour or so break-time/nap…

prior to Residency, i had some good experience w/hypnosis, affirmations, positivity and dove all the way up to my hair into NLP and not-quite-nearly-as-much into the concepts of meditation, spirituality, etc….so, during this time of deep deep deeeeepest reflection, self-examination, preparation for a possible SINGLE LAST CHANCE EVER to actually prove my worth to some old men whose minds are nearly impossible to change once they’re set on something… just maybe I can get soak up some positivity or gain some serenity (or perhaps just grow some balls) perhaps, somewhere near or actually ON THE PAGES OF THIS website…? :)

p.s. thanks for everything here, i appreciate anything/everything that anyone might be willing to offer in terms of advice, assistance, etc… my tentative plan is just to focus on some affirmations regarding self-worth and maybe learn to ‘Put Off Procrastinating ‘til Tomorrow’… BTW, I was “drawn” here by the so-called ‘Abundance’ mindset. I really enjoyed the read.

shemmy has 3 bmindful Friends

shemmy's 272 Affirmations

Comments (2)Comments via RSS

Add Your Comment

You need to be logged in to comment! Sign Up or Log In Now!