Hello everyone,
This is my first posting on the forum. I am delighted to have found it.
I feel dreadful at the moment. I need some input and guidance please.
Being loving and supportive towards others is very, very important to me. In fact I believe it the way of life conducive to continuous movement towards one’s highest self. I try to do it every day in whatever way I can think of and I love it.
I do not expect it to be reciprocated. Obviously it hurts me when it isn’t but usually I have no problem in detaching with love from that person. My position then becomes, “Well that person is clearly not interested in associating with me and I must respect that. If, therefore, the best way I can be supportive of her/him is by staying out of their way and leaving them alone then so be it”.
However, I have a real challenge on my hands right now.
A couple of years ago the company I work for sort of amalgamated with another company. I didn’t feel threatened – even if I had it wouldn’t have made any difference. I resolved to make them as welcome as I could and made an effort to be kind, courteous and inclusive.
However, nothing was reciprocated – and still has not been to this day. That wouldn’t be so bad were it not for the fact they are pretty rude. The other day I was turning in to the car park and gave way so that two of their cars were able to get spaces ahead of me. I smiled – and they didn’t even look at me.
I really would like to be able to detach with love, but I am finding it incredibly hard to do so because I have to go in to work and see them. Every time I get in the car to go to the building I feel almost sick.
To be really truthful, after that episode the other day in the car park I have been incredibly angry. I feel poisoned. Despite my best efforts to disallow myself from dealing with the people in question with anything other than love and support, I just feel myself getting lost in anger and hatred again.
But as Oscar Wilde said, “Hate blinds people. Love can read the writing on the remotest star!”
I just can’t bear this. I want to deal with these people with real love. That DOESN’T mean I want to spend all my time falling over myself trying to make them like me, or even making myself like them, but it does mean that I want to get to place of “Whatever you do, whatever you say, I wish you well. The God in me worships the God in you”.
Genuinely, I want to detach with real love and I need help and guidance. I also need to pray and would be so grateful for any prayer recommendations.
Might anyone have any thoughts about what I might do from this point?
Sending out peace, love and blessings to you all,
Aslan
In response to Aslan’s post:
I have found when others are rude and discourteous it is almost always about them. It sounds like it is already uncomfortable for you and I wouldn’t want to make it more uncomfortable, although I’m not sure that can happen. It sounds pretty terrible for you. First I would say it is natural to feel upset and angry. I try to treat everyone with dignity and respect just like you. I have also learned it is good to express your feelings rather than hold them back. Suppressing your true honest feelings can cause anger to build. The only way I know to release it is to let others know when they have treated me badly. I ask them in as nice a way possible if they are intentionally trying to be rude and disrespectful toward me by …whatever they did? By doing so, it lets them know you are not going to let them abuse you in any way. It is difficult to confront them, but you have the absolute right to be treated in a kind and just manner.
Words are like seeds. When you write them out, they grow into your dreams and spark the imagination of others.
Poppy that is wonderful – thank you so much.
Your response has hit me in the heart and, should the right moment present itself, I will do as you suggest.
Thank you once again.
Peace and blessings,
Aslan