★IS THIS HOW WE ATTRACT THE RELATIONSHIPS WE WANT?

Why do we really love someone? Have you ever wondered about this?

Isn’t it that we love someone because we love how they are being? If so, have you ever wondered what causes a person, to be how they are? Heres what i currently think.

A person is the way they are because of the beliefs they have.

For example, if a person is kind and loving and confident and wise. They also deeply believe that this is the kind of person they are or want to be. This kind of person is merely acting out their dominant beliefs.

As we know, not everyone we come across seems kind, loving, comfident and wise. But it’s not because they can’t be this way, it’s because at some deep level, they believe they aren’t SUPPOSED to be this way. It may be that they were taught that they are meant to be stupid and mean, or callous and indifferent.

Now, that may seem ridiculous, but think about it, why else would a person behave in stupid, callous and mean ways?

I know one person who gets a thrill when he gets to be indifferent or inconsiderate towards someone. He gets a momentary thrill when he gets to be a bully or when he can laugh at someone else’s shortcomings. He seems to thrill at moments when he can put people down. Now, he doesn’t think of it as being mean, he sees it as having a little fun.

So, it seems to me, somewhere in his past he apparantly learned to think of it as fun, to put people down. Somewhere in his past he was taught that life is a game of one-upmanship, he was taught that, in order for him to have a good life someone else had to be belittled or made to suffer.

Take a pause and look at people’s behaviors through ‘the lens’ of law of attraction.

The law of attraction states that the ‘world out there’ will merely reflect back at us how we are. So, if we are genuinely loving, kind, considerate and confident and we value wisdom and attempt to act wisely, this is the kind of treatment we’re get back.

Whereas, if we (even unconsciously) believe it’s good to be mean, stupid or vicious or to put others down, or to be indifferent towards others, then this is how we will tend to behave, and what we’ll get back is others who seem to only want to be mean or vicious to us or who want to put us down or be indifferent to us.

Could this be the way life ‘delivers’ us our relationships?

Do you want loving, uplifting, happy, nuturing, caring, strong, trustworthy, win-win and even inspiring relationships? Then, it seems to me, you need to become clear with yourself that this is the kind of person you want to be.

Fuel and nurture and feed these qualities. Get clear on the qualities you want to embody – trustworthiness, caring, considerateness, wisdom, ect. Get clear on why it’s important to you to embody these characteristics.

Then, as you more and more embody these characteristics, just notice over time, if your life begins to reflect what you embody and believe and value.

Could it be that, the way to ATTRACT and KEEP the relationships we really want, is to become the person that is a reflection of the kinds of people we want in our lives?

Could it be that to attract that perfect partner that we desire into our lives, all we have to do is become that type of person?

Thank you Robert…

Excellent thread.

Your first question “Why do we really love someone?”

I have wondered this for many years…

I have come up with a few different approaches!!!

There really is “chemistry”, and thank our Lucky Stars that the same “chemistry” is not running wild and free. And, I do not recommend this approach. Its a lot like bull riding, getting thrown and perhaps wildly injured! Not good, but, still, chemistry is undeniably powerful. Its like the chemicals in the brain and the chemical pathway, and there is something very powerful that almost cannot be broken once that connection is made.

Is “chemistry” still Love? Yes, very much so! And, Love is Not enough. So, if what you have is chemistry, its an unfortunate match, and the pain will likely exceed love, and both people get horribly hurt, because chemistry has NOTHING to do with values, nothing to do with fulfilling life dreams, ambitions, or possibilities. Chemistry is chemistry, straight up.

Your last point: “We attract that perfect partner, we become that perfect partner”. YES, I believe that this is the most desirable approach and it leads to the greatest success rate and leads to the most fulfilling expressions of healthy, dynamic and devoted partnerships possible.This approach is the most amiable to joining and sharing values, mutual expression of life long dreams, building dynamic partnership where both parties function at their desired level of optimization, and health, happiness and prosperity are constantly available…