This is an excerpt taken from the book: Loves hidden symmetry by Bert Hellinger:
The Question
We know our conscience as a horse know the riders who ride it and as the helmsman knows the stars by which he sets his course. But many riders ride the horse – and many helmsmen steer the ship, each guided by a different star. The question becomes: who shall command the riders and which course shall the captain choose?
The Answer
A disciple asked his teacher, “Tell me what freedom is.”
“Which freedom?” asked the teacher.
“The first freedom is foolishness.” Thats like a horse that throws its rider with a triumphant whinny, only to feel the saddle girth pulled tighter.
“The second freedom is remorse.” Remorse is like the helmsman who goes down with the ship, after he sailed it onto a reef, rather than seek safety in a life boat with the others.
“The third freedom is understanding.” Understanding comes, alas, only after foolishness and remorse. Its like a shaft of wheat that bends in the wind, and because it bends where it is weak, endures.
The disciple asked, “Is that all?”
The teacher said, “Many think they’re seeking the truth of their own soul, but its the Greater Soul that is thinking and seeking in them. Like nature, it allows great variety, but replaces with ease those who try to cheat. But to those who allow it to think in them, it allows, in turn, a little freedom, helping them like a river helps a swimmer cross to the other shore if she surrenders to the current and allows herself to be swept along.”
“Radical Acceptance is the ability to face hardships with greater love and deeper awareness.
Contemplation shapes radical acceptance as a way to choose love and peace over anger and despair.
Begin by finding this within ourselves before helping others.