★☼Loving-Lists (Reminders to Self)

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If you find things that have assisted you, add the list & source to thread . Thanks, selfcare
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Loving Reminders to Self
If you find things that have assisted you, add the list & source to thread . Thanks, selfcare

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• Here it is, a positive ‘to-do’ list for the upcoming year – 30 things to start doing for yourself by Marc & Angel  A Positive To-Do List

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    You cannot be lonely if you like the person you’re alone with. Wayne Dyer
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    Love is what we were born with. Fear is what we have learned here. The spiritual journey is the relinquishment – or unlearning – of fear and the acceptance of love back into our hearts. Love is…our ultimate reality and our purpose on earth. To be consciously aware of it, to experience love in ourselves and others, is the meaning of life.- Marianne Williamson
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  • “A loving person lives in a loving world. A hostile person lives in a hostile world. Everyone you meet is your mirror.” Ken Keyes

  • We have to learn to be our own best friends because we fall too easily into the trap of being our own worst enemies.
    - Roderick Thorp

     

• • “ Starting today, GIVE UP … marc and angel”:GIVE UP… Give Up
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  • ¹ Letting the opinions of others control your life. – People know your name, not your story. They’ve heard what you’ve done, but not what you’ve been through. So take their opinions of you with a grain of salt. In the end, it’s not what others think, it’s what you think about yourself that counts. Sometimes you have to do exactly what’s best for you and your life, not what’s best for everyone else.
  • ² The shame of past failures. – You will fail sometimes, and that’s okay. The faster you accept this, the faster you can get on with being brilliant. Your past does not equal your future . Just because you failed yesterday; or all day today; or a moment ago; or for the last six months; or for the last sixteen years, doesn’t have any impact on the current moment. All that matters is what you do right now. Read Awaken the Giant Within.
  • ³ Being indecisive about what you want. – You will never leave where you are until you decide where you would rather be. It’s all about finding and pursuing your passion. Neglecting passion blocks creative flow. When you’re passionate, you’re energized . Likewise, when you lack passion, your energy is low and unproductive. Energy is everything when it comes to being successful. Make a decision to figure out what you want, and then pursue it passionately.
  • ⁴ Procrastinating on the goals that matter to you. – There are two primary choices in life: to accept conditions as they exist, or accept the responsibility for changing them Follow your intuition. Don’t give up trying to do what you really want to do. When there is love and inspiration, you can’t go wrong. And whatever it is you want to do, do it now. There are only so many tomorrows. Trust me, in a year from now, you will wish you had started today.
  • ⁵ Choosing to do nothing. – You don’t get to choose how you are going to die, or when. You can only decide how you are going to live, right now. Every day is a new chance to choose. Choose to change your perspective. Choose to flip the switch in your mind from negative to positive. Choose to turn on the light and stop fretting about with insecurity and doubt. Choose to do work that you are proud of. Choose to see the best in others, and to show your best to others. Choose to truly LIVE , right now.
  • ⁶ Your need to be right. – If you keep on saying you’re right, even if you are right now, eventually you will be wrong. Aim for success, but never give up your right to be wrong Because when you do, you will also lose your ability to learn new things and move forward with your life. Read The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People.
  • ⁷ Running from problems that should be fixed. – We make life harder than it has to be. The difficulties started when… conversations became texting, feelings became subliminal, sex became a game, the word ‘love’ fell out of context, trust faded as honesty waned, insecurities became a way of living, jealously became a habit, being hurt started to feel natural, and running away from it all became our solution. Stop running! Face these issues, fix the problems, communicate, appreciate, forgive and LOVE the people in your life who deserve it .
  • ⁸ Making excuses rather than decisions. – Life is a continuous exercise in creative problem solving A mistake doesn’t become a failure until you refuse to correct it. Thus, most long-term failures are the outcome of people who make excuses instead of decisions.
  • ⁹ Overlooking the positive points in your life. – What you see often depends entirely on what you’re looking for. Do your best and surrender the rest When you stay stuck in regret of the life you think you should have had, you end up missing the beauty of what you do have. You will have a hard time ever being happy if you aren’t thankful for the good things in your life right now. Read The Happiness Project.
  • ¹⁰ Not appreciating the present moment. – We do not remember days, we remember moments. Too often we try to accomplish something big without realizing that the greatest part of life is made up of the little things. Live authentically and cherish each precious moment of your journey. Because when you finally arrive at your desired destination, I guarantee you, another journey will begin.

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• • Marc & Angel 15 simple suggestions for those who want to break free from the mold and truly live more of their life – to experience it and enjoy it to the fullest, instead of settling for a mere existence

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Marc and Angel Hack Life POST WRITTEN BY: ANGEL
10 Habits You Must Quit to Be Happy
When you quit doing the wrong things, you make more room for the things that make you happy. So starting today…

1. Quit procrastinating on your goals.
Some people dream of success while others wake up and work hard at it. Action and change are often resisted when they’re needed most. Get a hold of yourself and have discipline. Putting something off instantly makes it harder and scarier. What we don’t start today won’t be finished by tomorrow. And there’s nothing more stressful than the perpetual lingering of an unfinished task.

The secret to getting ahead is simply getting started. Starting, all by itself, is usually sufficient to build enough momentum to keep the ball rolling. So forget about the finish line and just concentrate on taking your first step. Say to yourself, “I choose to start this task with a small, imperfect step.” All those small steps will add up and you’ll actually get to see changes fairly quickly. Read Getting Things Done.

2. Quit blaming others and making excuses.
Stop blaming others for what you have or don’t have, or for what you feel or don’t feel. When you blame others for what you’re going through, you deny responsibility and perpetuate the problem. Stop giving your power away and start taking responsibility for your life. Blaming is just another sorry excuse, and making excuses is the first step towards failure; you and only you are responsible for your life choices and decisions.

3. Quit trying to avoid change.
If nothing ever changed there would be no sunrise the next morning. Most of us are comfortable where we are even though the whole universe is constantly changing around us. Learning to accept this is vital to our happiness and general success. Because only when we change, do we grow, and begin to see a world we never knew was possible.

And don’t forget, however good or bad a situation is now, it will change. That’s the one thing you can count on. So embrace it, and realize that change happens for a reason. It won’t always be easy or obvious at first, but in the end it will be worth it.

4. Quit trying to control the uncontrollable.
If you try to control everything, and then worry about the things you can’t control, you are setting yourself up for a lifetime of frustration and misery.

Some forces are out of your control, but you can control how you react to things. Everyone’s life has positive and negative aspects – whether you’re happy or not depends greatly on which aspects you focus on. The best thing you can do is to let go of what you can’t control, and invest your energy in the things you can – like your attitude.

5. Quit talking down to yourself.
Nothing will bring you down quicker than berating yourself. The mind is a superb instrument if used right, but when used incorrectly, it becomes very destructive. Be aware of your mental self-talk. We all talk silently to ourselves in our heads, but we aren’t always conscious of what we’re saying or how it’s affecting us.

As Henry Ford once stated, “Whether you think you can, or you think you can’t, you’re right.” One of the major causes of why we fail is due to self-doubt and negative self-talk. The way to overcome negative thoughts and destructive emotions is to develop opposing, positive emotions that are stronger and more powerful. Listen to your self-talk and replace negative thoughts with positive ones, over time you will change the trajectory of your life. Read The How of Happiness.

6. Quit criticizing others.
The negativity you bleed out toward others will gradually cripple your own happiness. When you truly feel comfortable with your own imperfections, you won’t feel threatened or offended by the imperfections you see in other people.

So stop worrying about the flaws you see in everyone else, and focus on yourself. Let the constant growth and improvement in your own life keep you so busy that you have no time left to criticize others.

7. Quit running from your problems and fears.
Trust me, if everyone threw their problems in a pile for you to see, you would grab yours back. Tackle your problems and fears swiftly, don’t run away from them. The best solution is to face them head on no matter how powerful they may seem.

Fears, in particularly, stop you from taking chances and making decisions. They keep you confined to just the small space where you feel completely comfortable. But your life’s story is simply the culmination of many small, unique experiences, many of which require you to stretch your comfort zone. Letting your fears and worries control you is not ‘living,’ it’s merely existing.

Bottom line: Either you own your problems and fears, or they will ultimately own you.

8. Quit living in another time and place.
Some people spend their entire lives trying to live in another time and place. They lament about what has been, what they could have done, or what might become. However, the past is gone, and the future doesn’t exist. No matter how much time we spend thinking and lamenting about either, it doesn’t change anything.

One of life’s sharpest paradoxes is that our brightest future hinges on our ability to pay attention to what we’re doing right now, today.

We need to live more in the moment. Living in the moment requires active, open, intentional awareness on the present. Don’t fantasize about being on vacation while at work, and don’t worry about the work piling up on your desk when you’re on vacation. Live for now. Notice the beauty unfolding around you.

9. Quit trying to be someone you’re not.
One of the greatest challenges in life is being yourself in a world that’s trying to make you like everyone else. Someone will always be prettier, someone will always be smarter, someone will always be younger, but they will never be you. Don’t change so people will like you. Be yourself and the right people will love you, and you’ll love yourself more too. The Road Less Traveled.

10. Quit being ungrateful.
Not all the puzzle pieces of life will seem to fit together at first, but in time you’ll realize they do, perfectly. So thank the things that didn’t work out, because they just made room for the things that will . And thank the ones who walked away from you, because they just made room for the ones who won’t.

No matter how good or bad you have it, wake up each day thankful for your life. Someone somewhere else is desperately fighting for theirs. Instead of thinking about what you’re missing, try thinking about what you have that everyone else is missing.

 

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• You Should Be Able To Say

 

 

1. I am following my heart and intuition .

2. I am proud of myself

3. I am making a difference
4. I am happy and grateful

5. I am growing in to the best version of me
6. I am making my time count

7. I am honest with myself
8. I am good to those I care about

9. I know what unconditional love feels like

10. I have forgiven those who once hurt me

11. I take full accountability for my life

12. I have no regrets
…

Follow your heart. Be true to yourself. Do what makes you happy. Be with who makes you smile. Laugh as much as you breathe. Love as long as you live. Say what you need to say. Offer a helping hand when you’re able. Appreciate all the things you do have. Smile. Celebrate your small victories. Learn from your mistakes. Realize that everything is a lesson in disguise. Forgive. And let go of the things you can’t control

 

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I am fond of the life coach from Pawfully Organized. Kathy Wells Paauw: Productivity Consultant,Certified Coach & Trainer

In newsletter I have of hers, Issue #131— April 2012 entitled Life with No Regrets , she had the following notes & list and I quote:

Someone recently sent me an article written by a nurse who worked in palliative care. Unfortunately, the article did not include her name, so I am unable to attribute this to the person who originally wrote about it. This nurse worked with patients who had gone home to die. The following is a paraphrase of what she reported learning from her patients who were faced with their own mortality. These patients only had 3-12 weeks left to live.

When asked about what they regretted or what they wished they had done differently, common themes surfaced. Here are the most common responses she received:

1.I wish I’d had the courage to live a life true to myself, not the life others expected of me. This was the most common regret of all. When people realize that their life is almost over and they take time to reflect on it, they become aware of how many dreams have gone unfulfilled. Most reported that they had not followed even a half of their dreams. They would die knowing that this was due to choices they had made.

2.I wish I didn’t work so hard. Every single male patient shared this regret. Some of her female patients did, too. They regretted not spending more time with the family because they allowed their work to keep them running on the proverbial hamster wheel.

3.I wish I’d had the courage to express my feelings. Many suppressed their authentic feelings in order to keep peace with others. As a result, they settled for a mediocre existence. They did not tap into their authenticity or follow the path they truly desired. Bitterness and resentment set in, and some attributed their physical illness to the stress this created in their lives.

4.I wish I had stayed in touch with my friends. Some of the most significant relationships had gone by the wayside, and it was not until they were on their deathbed that they decided to reach out to some special people in their lives. They strongly regretted that they had not given their friendships the time and effort that they deserved. In some cases, they could not track down a cherished friend or family member in time.

5.I wish that I let myself be happier. Some recognized that happiness is a choice, and they chose to stay stuck in old patterns and habits that did not serve them well. For many, this was because of a fear of what others might think. When one is on their deathbed, what others think does not matter nearly as much.

Here are some questions to help you think about what you may want to change in your life NOW!

•Where do you see yourself in five to ten years if you continue doing what you’re doing and being who you’re being right now? Answer this question for each of these areas of your life:
◦Marriage / committed relationship
◦Business / career
◦Family
◦Finances
◦Spiritual life
◦Health
◦Hobbies

•What concrete action steps do you choose to take to make shifts in your behavior that will help you move toward what you want to do, be or have in each of the areas listed above?
•If you had one free day to do anything you wanted to do, what would your day look like? Where would you be? Who would you be with? What would you be doing?

•If you knew that you only had one year left to live, what would you do that is different from what you are doing now?

•What are some life experiences that are on your Bucket List? What do you dream of doing, being or having?

•What feelings do you have that you have not authentically shared with those you care most about? What would be possible in your life if you were to honestly share? (Sharing your authentic feelings could mean ending an unhealthy relationship.)

•Are there any important relationships that you have neglected that you choose to invest in NOW?

•What old patterns, habits, beliefs or relationships are you ready to let go of so you can be happy?

©2000-2012 Paauw Enterprises, Inc.. All Rights Reserved.

 

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  Success Declarations By Leonard Szymczak, MSW, LCSW
  ♦I am committed to my success which comes
  easily and effortlessly.
  ♦I love being successful.
  ♦I am successful doing what I love.
  ♦I am courageous and joyful each step of the way.
  ♦I inspire others with my success.
  ♦I ask for help whenever I need it.
  ♦I generously give and gratefully receive.
  ♦I turn failures into opportunities for success.
  ♦I am grateful for every success in my life.
  ♦I AM SUCCESSFUL AND I KNOW IT, YES I AM!
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I just found this website this morning that looks very helpful
http://www.enlightenedfeelings.com/find_joy.html

I did copy part of it but noticed at the bottom you can’t copy or quote without written permision so I deleted it .

I am most grateful for the gift of gratitude in my life. Gratitude and love are the most precious gifts that I have been given. Thanks and love.

In response to Jacoranda’s post:
I so agree, and welcome Jacoranda to bmindful(:

In response to flowergirl’s post:
great link! Thanks flowergirl!

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10 Steps to Loving Yourself

1. Stop all criticism.
Criticism never changes a thing. Refuse to criticize yourself. Accept yourself exactly as you are. Everybody changes. When you criticize yourself, your changes are negative. When you approve of yourself, your changes are always positive.
2. Don’t scare yourself.
Stop terrorizing yourself with your thoughts. It’s a dreadful way to live. Find a mental image that gives you pleasure (like yellow roses or a waterfall), and immediately switch your scary thought to a pleasure thought.
3. Be gentle and kind and patient. Be gentle with yourself. Be kind to yourself. Be patient with yourself as you learn new ways of thinking. Treat yourself as you would someone you really loved.
4. Be kind to your mind.
Self hatred is only hating your own thoughts. Don’t hate yourself for having the thoughts. Gently change your thoughts.
5. Praise yourself.
Criticism breaks down the inner spirit. Praise builds it up. Praise yourself as much as you can. Tell yourself how well you are doing with every little thing. Remember that life is a process; sometimes you will falter, slip into old, unhealthy behaviors, or fall back into self-destructive patterns. Don’t give up and don’t beat yourself up! Instead, remind yourself that the learning curve is never straight, and then get back on the right track. There is a difference between “slipping up” and being a failure!
6. Support yourself.
Find ways to support yourself. Reach out to friends and allow them to help you. It is being strong to ask for help when you need it most.
7. Be loving to your negatives.
Acknowledge that you created them to fulfill a need. Now you are finding new positive ways to fulfill those needs. So, lovingly release the old negative patterns.
8. Take care of your body.
Learn about nutrition. What kind of fuel does your body need to have optimum energy and vitality? Learn about exercise. What kind of exercise can you enjoy? Cherish and revere the temple you live in.
9. Mirror work.
Look into your eyes often. Express this growing sense of love you have for yourself. Forgive yourself while looking into the mirror. At least once a day say, “I love you, I really love you!”
10. DO IT NOW!! Don’t wait until you get well, or lose the weight, or get the new job or the new relationship. Begin now— and do the best you can!

In response to SelfcareEnthusiast’s post:
love this list Selfcare

great thread ,we need to love ourselves more

 

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• Thanks flowergirl. 
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Stop looking outside for scraps of pleasure of fulfillment, for validation, security or love - you have a treasure within that is infinitely greater than anything the world can offer ~ Eckhart Tolle

wow! haven't seen this thread in yrs!

Thanks for bringing it to surface, sunnyside