★Peace with Money

Part 1: Escape, Save, Make Peace
Part 2: Planning
Part 3: Finding Right Work
Part 4: Philosophy and Tie Dye, Dude
Part 5: Unblocking
Part 6: Anxiety, Generosity of Spirit, Forgiveness
Part 7: Perception
Part 8: Abundance

Here are my notes from Making Peace with Money

This will be a long post, but there is some information that I believe many if not all of you will find useful. Consider getting a spiral notebook and making it into some sort of money workbook for yourself. It will come in handy for integrating this information into your life. This material isn’t directly copied from the book and much of what you read is just what I got from it with a little bit of me stirred in.

Jeff’s Notes (Part 1)
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“There can be no freedom or beauty about a homelife that depends on borrowing and debt”. From Henry Gibson’s “Doll House”

A satisfying joyful relationship with money can be reached.
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Free yourself from debt. It is the foundation of making peace with money. Do NOT take on any new unsecured debt! You can walk away from secured debt, you just lose the asset securing the debt. Unsecured debt, however leaves you vulnerable to all sorts of dangers such as leins, judgements, harassment from creditors and others. Pay for every service or good when you receive it. It is almost impossible to be at peace with money when you have unsecured debt. The ONLY thing you can do with a credit card is incur debt. If you ABSOLUTELY MUST have a credit card for some reason then send in the payment the very same day you use it. If you can’t pay it off the same day then don’t use it.

Keep a spending record for a month to see where your money is actually going. Write down everything in it for a month – from a pack of gum to rent and insurance. Write it all down. At the end of the month categorize all of the expenditures. Break them down into items such as: Clothing, Food, Recreation, Rent and so on.

You can either cut expenses or bring in more money. THAT IS IT!

To free yourself from debt, especially the SLAVERY of unsecured debt get out your notebook and let your imagination run free. Write down everything you can think of that either cuts expenses or brings in more money. It is important for you to understand the next two sentences so pay attention and let it soak in. One of the most profitable investments you will ever make is to free yourself of unsecured debt. It has the same impact on your life as an annual investment return of 16 to 20 percent.

To make peace with money you have to meet your needs. Your needs are food, shelter and clothing of decent quality on a regular basis. Beyond these basic needs there is: STUFF, RECREATION AND SAVINGS.

Now. Let’s talk for a minute about underearning. You needs to MASTER earning. STOP UNDEREARNING! DO NOT TAKE WORK THAT PAYS YOU LESS THAN YOU NEED! This probably sounds obvious, but to many, many people it is not. Do not let worldly pressures cause you to take work that won’t let you meet your needs. Turn it down!

Also, DO NOT say no to money! Stop deflecting money! Many people do this. (I personally have done this many times in my life. I have often felt a sense of guilt or shame for taking money from people for no justifiable reason.) Underearners do this all the time. If you are doing it then STOP!

Another thing you should do is to stop short-cutting profitable notions. We get and idea, we get excited about it for a moment and then let negative chatter overwhelm us and we wind up not even trying. Instead, we make excuses. Look for opportunities. Go for that job. Don’t let negative chatter or excuses you hold you back. “I’m not ready”. “I don’t like that company”. “I’ve never done anything like that before”. Let money into your life. Stop deflecting it.
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EXERCISE: RESOLVE
Find the desire within you to bring more money into your life. Make contact with that desire. Experience it, true desire. Then create the resolve to do something about your situation. Without the resolve your enthusiasm will not last.

(Note: Several exercises involve meditation. I am not going to type out all of that stuff. If you are reading this, then you probably already know something about how to meditate.)

Enter a meditative state. Feel the desire to bring more money into your life. Associate money with a clean, happy, joyous energy. Smile if you feel it. Say yes to this pure energy. RESOLVE to bring money into your life.

Do this meditation every day for a week, then once a week over the next year.
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Nothing comes into being without having first been conceived of in the mind. Learning to work intentionally with vision, rather than haphazardly will help you to make peace with money.

Many of the limits you perceive in your life are limits you have placed on yourself without intending to and almost always unknowingly. You can eliminate those limits.
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< more to come >

(Part 2)
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Get your money notebook.

Take some time and relax. Get clear and still. Turn your thoughts to people who like you, who care for you, who are well disposed to you. Pick one of those people who sincerely cares about you and would only want you to be fulfilled and happy. (It is best not to choose a family member or spouse for reasons I’m not going to try and go into in these notes.) You are to write a one or two page letter to that person, but you are not going to send it. In the letter you are to describe the next five years of your life as it would be if everything very well for you. You are not to drift into fanciful ideas about winning the lottery or winning Publishers Clearinghouse or anything of that nature. Just explain how you would be living if all went well and smoothly. Would you be living in a house or an apartment? Where would your home be located? On the beach, in the mountains, in the city? How would you be earning your living? What would you be doing in your free time? What hobbies might you have? How would you feel if you were at peace with money? What would your relationships be like? Write an honest overall view of an ideal life for you based in reality, confidence and very good fortune.

It is important to know in some detail how you would like to be living with money. Knowing this brings you out of the fog and into clarity. With clarity you can begin to affect change and change can begin to take place.

Now, you need a plan. No worthwhile undertaking succeeds without a plan and a good plan starts with a good mission statement. A good mission statement is brief, clear and uncomplicated. For our plan our mission statement will have a purpose, a strategy and our values.

Purpose: What you ultimately wish to accomplish.
Strategy: A short explanation of how you will fulfill that purpose.
Values: What guides and motivates you.

Get your mission statement clearly fixed in your mind and in your notebook write out the tactics you will use to implement your strategy. At the top of your page write “Five Year Goal”. In one sentence under that write how far toward fulfilling your mission you could reasonably and realistically be toward fulfilling your mission if you acted with confidence and set out to achieve that goal.

Write a new heading. “One Year Actions”. What do you need to do within one years time to bring you toward your five year goal in service of your mission statement? What is reasonable if you act with confidence?

Write a new heading. “One Month Actions”. Under that write out four things that you will do this month. Pick one of the four and complete it within the next seven days. Finish the other three by the end of the month.

Here is a rough example to help you get started.
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Mission Statement: To support myself doing work I am suited to and enjoy.

Strategy: Examine the activities I enjoy and select the one that has the best chance of supporting me in my mission. Minimize my expenses. Develop a plan that will shift me into that activity. Implement the plan.

Values: List them and how they relate.

Five Year Goal.
To be making a decent living doing what I like either working for myself or a suitable company with lots of autonomy.

One Year Actions.
Decide on which activity I am going to do for my living. Learn income for this profession. High, low, avg. Decide how much I need to meet my needs at an acceptable level. Contribute to savings each month so I can advance toward making switch to new career. Learn daily functions needed for a job in this profession. Start learning.

One Month Actions.
1. List all activities I enjoy doing.
2. Pick favorite three.
3. Select one of those three and thoroughly research.
4. Interview at least three people in that profession. Set up appointments. Buy book on topic and start reading up on subject.
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Big Time Frame = Big Actions
Small Time Frame = Small Actions.

Break things down into small actions.

(Part 3)
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Work is necessary to life. Getting is necessary to life. An animal has to “get stuff” to live and so do you. When a tiger, a bird of a fish stops getting, nature says, “Okay, goodbye”.

Everyone needs a healthy relationship with work. It is important for your physical, mental, emotional and spiritual health. Work is effort, BUT it doesn’t have to be a misery. Why are so many people miserable in their jobs? Well, part of it could be perspective and attitude. We can do a lot with adjusting our paradigms. One thing that will be beneficial for certain is finding right work.

FINDING RIGHT WORK
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Right work is NATURAL FOR YOU.
Right work is APPROPRIATE FOR YOU.
Right work is LIFE ENHANCING FOR YOU.
Right work is NOT MISERY.
Right work DOES NOT MAKE YOU DEAD INSIDE.

Get out your notebook. Find a cheerful spot that makes you feel good and get quiet and peaceful. At the top of the page write “Ten Activities I Really Enjoy Doing”. Three elements must be present for the activity to make your list; PLEASURE, RELISH, and SATISFACTION. Emphasis may be on only one of these three, but all three must be present. Take your time. When you finish your list you are going to put it away for a few days.

Okay, a few days have passed. Get out your list and start linking the things you like to do with jobs for which you could actually get paid. Write down as many as you can think of. Keep pleasure, relish and satisfaction in mind. Ideally something in your list will meet all three requirements, but at least one must be present. You can get by with less than three if the other one or two are important enough to you. The more, the better.

Look over the list. Now. Prepare to be amazed by the brilliance of this exercise… Pick the one that appeals to you most that has the best chance of succeeding. Ta Daa!

CONGRATULATIONS!!!!!
NOW YOU KNOW YOUR RIGHT WORK!

Now you just need a plan, and, well, you already know how to do that.

One think to keep in mind. (I have struggled with this personally.) THERE IS NOT ONLY ONE JOB THAT IS RIGHT FOR YOU. You have many roads open to you that lead to a fulfilling, meaningful life. ((I personally have spent way too much time standing in front of the ice cream counter frozen in place. You can wait until you are dead or you can jump in.)) You are not DOOMED. Believing that your perfect life lies in one precise and specific job (or in one specific person or almost anything for that matter as far as I’m concerned) is a trap many (including me) has fallen into. ONLY BENEFITS WILL COME TO YOU BY FINDING RIGHT WORK AND THERE IS MORE THAN ONE RIGHT WORK FOR YOU.

(Part 4)
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Get out your philosophy textbook, turn to page 327 and put on your favorite tie-dye shirt . (Just kidding… or IS he.)

Money exists only in that it represents something. Also, unless you can completely cut yourself off from the rest of humanity, money touches your life.

Money usually has images and symbols associated with it. Think about the images associated with money. What are they? Leaders, temples, gods, important building of state, life, energy, bounty, food, vegetation, wheat, fish, game. Why? Well, money represents energy. Money is an important representation of energy and should be taken seriously. There is nothing shallow about taking money seriously. It is a source of power. The outward expenditure of mankinds energy takes place in and through money in the world in which we life. To understand the world and to understand our own lives we need to have at least some understanding of money and what it represents. It is a reality of civilization. May not always be that way, but it has been for a long time and the last time I checked it still is.

It is probably not possible to fully understand money in all of its depth, power and variegation – at least not in an intellectual sense, but one can recognize the profoundness of money. Recognizing the power money represents and learning to live in harmony with it will help you to achieve peace with money.

(Part 5)
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What have you done with the money in your life? Can you answer that? Do you understand the question? Most people view money as something separate from themselves. We usually think of it as something that acts upon us and to some degree we act upon. We may not want to, but we should see money as a reflection of who we are. To make peace with money we need to examine what we do with it and what we have done with it in the past. This type of examination my intimidate some people.

Get out your money notebook. Get in a peaceful state. Relax and let go of your ego. Abandon any thoughts of congratulations or regret. We are trying to step outside ourselves and examine without judgement. Look over your life. What are the worst things you have done with money? Look for things that make you feel ashamed. Look for things that you wouldn’t want others to know. Take your time with this, be neutral and list them. When finished set your notebook aside. Stand up and take a few relaxing breaths. Breathe in fresh air and release any negative feelings that may have come up. Give yourself a few minutes and when you are ready sit back down and get out your notebook again. Re-enter your previous state of non-judgement. Get calm and peaceful. You are safe. Re-examine you life and this time list the ten best things you have done with money. When you have finished stand up and ‘revitalize’ yourself again. Put your pad away somewhere safe and private.

The next step is where this exercise can make a really powerful change in your life.

You are going to share this list with another person you really trust and who would want the best for you. You are not to read it to a spouse or family member. The role of the witness it not to judge, it is to listen only. Share the two lists with this witness. They are not to comment on the lists, only to acknowledge that he or she has heard you and understands. It is okay if they thank you for confiding in them or showing so much trust in them, but nothing more. Absolutely no commentary on the list.

Why? What is the point? Because it is profound and powerful and will have an affect on your life. Sharing these deeply important things with another human being heals us on a very deep level. It is a type of release. We are releasing the acts that we are ashamed of and make us think less of ourselves. These things act like poison that is blocking our psychic energy. It takes a lot out of us repressing these things whether we are aware of it or not. They are sources of fear, anger, shame and isolation. Sharing the good things brings us back into balance. The good things are just as real as the bad ones.

(I have not done any of these exercises yet, so I can’t comment. I just finished up my notes and wanted to share them with you guys.)

The author says that the previous exercise will help almost anyone and many people find it to be powerful. He says everyone will benefit from it. Often immediately.

(Part 6)
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Anxiety, Generosity of Spirit, Forgiveness

Many people experience anxiety over spending money; even on things they really need or want. “I don’t have enough”, or “Thee won’t be enough left”.

Here is an exercise that deals with anxiety over money.

For the next seven days whenever you hand money over to someone else silently say to yourself, “I bless this money; I give it to you; I wish you pleasure in using it”. Do the same thing for the checks mail or any other similar type of transaction. Do the same thing whenever you receive money. “I bless this money, I consciously take pleasure in receiving it”.

Generosity is a aquality of unselfishness. Self-sacrifice is voluntarily accepting or even inflicting upon oneself pain in order for another to benefit. A poor parent who does without so that their child can eat is self-sacrifice. A soldier who throws himself in front of a grenade to save his fellows is self-sacrifice. Generosity or unselfishness is simply being open-handed – it is the opposite of being fearful, covetous or grasping. Practicing generosity helps overcome a seige mentality – a belief that there isn’t enough for you; that you have to defend what little you have. Generosity relaxes the spirit and brings a sense of well-being. It facilitates the flow of money into and through your life. Giving away money can dispel the feeling that there is not or will not be enough. Giving anonymously is an especially powerful way to do that. It can be deeply gratifying and generate very positive feelings within you. Consider tithing, giving to charity, giving anonymously to someone in need, or even giving to someone who isn’t in need. (One thing I think you should not do is to give to panhandlers. Many of them are drug addicts and you may be feeding a destructive habit by doing so. There are legitimate organizations to help people in genuine need. This is me talking, not the author of the book.) If you give to a person anonymously just send the money and then forget about it. Don’t congratulate yourself or imagine the receiver’s reaction. Write a note and tell them that you have been blessed and wanted to share with someone. In your note don’t mention anything about them being in need if they are. Say that you picked them at random from the phonebook or something. Let them know that you have no intention of keeping their address or following up with them in any way in the future. Then forget about it. And as in the previous exercise, bless the money you send.

Here is an exercise to help you develop your Generosity of Spirit.

One day a month see everyone that you know as a stranger and everyone that you don’t know as a life-long friend. Look at your calendar. Pick a day that makes sense to you and start doing this every month from now on. What will happen is this: you will notice many new things about your old friends and acquaintances and renew your sense of kinship with your fellow human beings.

Here is an exercise to help you develop your sense of Loving Kindness toward yourself.

Meditation: “May I be safe and free from danger; may I be physically be physically happy; may I be mentally happy; may I live joyfully and with ease of well-being”.

Do every day for seven days. On the eighth day start doing half of the meditation with the focus on your self and half with the focus on a benefactor. On the fifteenth day, do 1/3 on self, 1/3 on benefactor and 1/3 on your children, wife, parents or other loved one. Each week add a new friend or relative. Work your way up to including acquaintances, strangers, people who irritate you, enemies and eventually all beings.

Resentment is toxic. Anger is a temporary, it passes. Resentment abides. Resentment is bitter. Free yourself from resentment. Learn to forgive. When you forgive you free YOURSELF from pain. When you forgive you free YOURSELF from pain. WHEN YOU FORGIVE YOU FREE YOURSELF FROM PAIN!

Here is an exercise to help you achieve forgiveness.

Meditation: (Name), I fully and freely forgive you. (Name), I set you free; I do not wish to hurt you; I wish you no harm. (Name), so far as I am concerned this issue between us is over and gone forever; you are free and I am free and all is well between us.

You may or may not ever see this person again, the point for you is to be at peace. A blocked channel is now open. Work with this meditation to release all resentments – real or perceived. Alimony, being cheated, passed over for a promotion, all of these types of things can create resentment. All of them can cause blockages.

(Part 7)
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Let’s talk about perception for a minute. Our perception of life is made up of our beliefs, attitudes and convictions. Our perception is what we think is real. You walk across your yard and see a snake. You feel that jolt of fear. You heart is pounding. Then you laugh, it is only a garden hose. For years it was believe that a human couldn’t run a mile in under four minutes. Then someone did it. Almost immediately runners around the world started running the mile in under four minutes. See, perception matters. The computer screen you are looking at isn’t solid. It’s moving, you just can’t see it. Your body is more of nothing than it is of something if ya’ know what I mean. Can you tell that you are moving at roughly 143 miles per second? Relative to the center of the galaxy you are. Why mention perception? Because, it is not practical or useful to perceive ourselves or money in distorted or limited ways.

When considering questions about money, your current circumstances, how you could make changes, whatever, it can be, (here I am going to use the overused word “very”) it can be very useful to consider different perspectives.

Get out your notebook. Write down a question you want the answer to. Now, ask yourself “What would ________ do?”. What would dad do? What would Ghandi do? What would the janitor in my building do? What would Karl Marx do? What would my ten year old niece do? What would Socrates do? In your notebook write a paragraph expressing what ten different people would do.

The previous exercise is something that would be beneficial for you to incorporate into your life on a regular basis. It will get you into the habit of seeing beyond your own limited perception.

(Part 8)
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Okay, so we talked about perception, not let’s talk about wealth, affluence and comfort. Wealth. Wealth (for this discussion) is money in GREAT AMOUNT. It is more than what it takes to be comfortable. It more than affluence. It is money in GREAT AMOUNT. Tens of millions or even billions. Bill Gates has wealth. Unless you were born into wealth or marry it, it is unlikely that you are ever going to have true wealth. Sure, it can happen. There are routes to great wealth. In most cases acquiring great wealth quickly requires a series singular types of incidents to occur. Stuff like having the right knowledge and skills at the right time in the right place at the right time and so on. I’m not going to go into all of that. Comfort and affluence, however, are definitely within reach. It is absolutely possible for you to become comfortable or affluent. AND to become comfortable or affluent you have to start with savings. There is even more good news. Creating savings isn’t difficult once you know how.

SAVING = BUYING

Saving is buying an investment. Saving is spending money on yourself. What are you buying with saving? You are buying profit. The more profit you buy, the more profit you CAN buy. Of all the things you can buy, profit is one of the best. Buying profit will definitely improve your relationship with money.

Don’t make saving a drudgery. Like a starvation diet that is almost certainly doomed to failure, so is saving. If it is a drudgery you more than likely give up. Make your money work. MAKE YOUR MONEY WORK. Every dollar you save can and should be like an employee who is working for you – an employee that sends you every paycheck he earns. Consider taking out your wallet right now and introduce yourself to a few new employees. Right now.

Here are some ideas for saving.
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1. Pay off unsecured debt.
2. Start paying your savings first. Take five dollars from every hundred you receive and save it. You probably won’t even miss it.
3. Pay yourself every time you do a common task around the house. Get a piggy bank or something and pay yourself every time you make the bed, take out the trash, do the laundry. Do it every day for three weeks. On the fourth week spend that money on something you want – a nice dinner out, something frivolous. Do this for the rest of your life.
4. Decide to work one overtime hour each week. Place the money you earn in this extra hour into savings. If you want, put 80% of those earnings into savings and spend the rest on yourself for something fun.

Here are some rules for investing.
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Keep your investments simple. Learn about something that interests you and invest there. Don’t try to master the whole world of investments; you will drive yourself crazy if you try.

Be conservative.

Never invest in things you don’t fully understand.

Select three good books on money management that appeal to you and read them over the coming year. Inform yourself.
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A word or three about abundance. First, abundance is subjective. And second, abundance can be yours.

Look over your life and narrow your focus a bit and you will realize that you are already abundant in some areas. (Stick with me here, this can be eye-opening and can have a positive affect on your view of your situation and your future. I’m going somewhere with this.) Do you like books? If you do and you have a lot of them then you have an abundance of books. Maybe you are into gardening and have a beautiful garden. Maybe it’s health. Maybe it is beauty. Maybe it is friendship. Maybe it is knowledge. Maybe it is a record collection. Whatever it is, you have some kind of abundance in your life. Learn to recognize the abundance around you. To be able to bring more abundance into your life you need to be able to recognize abundance. You need to know what it feels like.

Exercise: Get out your notebook. Pick one area of your life in which you feel there is no abundance. It could be almost anything – romance, time, friendship, towels, art, recreation, energy, software, spoons. Now ask yourself “Why Not?” “Why don’t I have an abundance of ______?” Now write down all the reasons. (I know, it’s complicated. Maybe you should read through the instructions a couple of times just to make sure you understand.) Ask why not and then answer the question. Write down everything you can think of large and small.

THEN: Do the things you aren’t doing.

Pretty amazing, huh?

When you do the last exercise don’t do it with money until you have done it for at least six other areas of your life. Once you have it down, apply it to money.

tha, tha, tha, that’s all folks…

I hope you enjoyed my notes!

Your friend,
Jeff

I’m reading Walden right now and it brought this to mind. Thought I’d bring it to the top.