★Ask The Wise Old Owl

We have so many nurturing, caring, Bmindful members I feel they might consider being a great help for others. What If someone is experiencing a life problem such as growing older or chronic pain, or death of a parent/child, etc., not seeking professional help, but advise from members who have experienced similar problems…it would be more of a support, encouragement thread. We could call it, “Ask The Old Wise Owl” A thread where anyone could ask what would you do in a situation like…

Okay, I’ll start. What would you do if your mother-in-law was 93 and to old and un-responsive to drive and she refused to quit driving even though she is dangerous to herself and everyone else?

In response to Poppy’s post: First let me say great thread!!! And this question-subject is close to my heart. And its a challenging one! We love our folks so much & ‘simply want them to be happy & safe, like they wanted for us…And they trust us, they often just don’t want to see us as their parent, and they don’t want to give up their rights/roles.

Coming from experiences of helping my own aging adult parents and other older adults… temperaments of course vary… (adult to adult/circumstance to circumstance)

Adults in their later stage of life, and any ‘realizing one is changing’ stage…it is difficult to admit our senses are changing, which actually sounds like a thread that can emerge from this(: Though, back to my responses(: Admitting…

Yes, I studied it…(: Though, so different when you’re close to the situation! I had parents and other lovely older adults I’ve assisted(: And even observing some of my own changes…have been fun to notice. That’s my humor(:

And for your question…for many adults losing the role of driving is simply huge. And telling someone close to you that…the time has come… is very emotional for the one who needs to come to this conclusion and the adult child/or anyone close sharing.I am going to start by gathering articles. And then I will share some thoughts(:

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AARP Family Conversations About Driving – A Few Tips
Who? Decide who is the best person to talk to Mom and Dad about sensitive topic; who do they trust to have their best interest in mind? What approach works best for them? (i.e. authority figure, sensitive approach, casual suggestion, direct conversation etc.) Should a spouse initiate the talk? Or is a doctor, adult child, other family member, friend, or even religious leader best? Anyone is better than a police officer – that’s your last resort.

AARP 10 Signs That it’s Time to Limit or Stop Driving If you notice one or more of these cautionary signs in yourself, or in a loved one who is driving, you might want to register yourself or that person for a driver-improvement course, such as the classroom or online courses offered by AARP Driver Safety.
AARP Talking With Older Adults How do you know when it’s time for your loved one to limit or stop driving? It’s a tough subject for most families, but it’s a serious matter. Now there’s help. AARP offers a free online seminar called We Need to Talk that will help you determine how to assess your loved ones’ driving skills and provide tools to help you have this important conversation. And since it’s online, you can set your own pace.
AARP Driving Resource Center Resources and activities located here are designed specifically for drivers looking to continue improving their driving knowledge and skills.

Lessened reserve Capacity [varies from individual to individual]-while slowness is not equated with incompetence… stressful situations are handled differently. [older adults, like people of any age need to “pace life realistically] ….needs/desires/abilities [also a physician…can go over the potential medications may also be culprits…reacting with different people…chemicals can also alter ones competence… There’s a list called a Beers list, medication Older adults are generally characterized as patients who may be at an increased risk for adverse drug events Hope these resources are helpful(:

In response to ‘Just’ For Me’s post:

I was unaware of these wonderful resources. Thank you so very much. This is something I will have to help resolve in the next week or so.

In response to Poppy’s post:
your welcome in regard to your post above

and thank you for such a wonderful thread idea…