- You are Magnificent…Do You Need a Reminder? Do a Rewrite (:
RECONSTRUCTING OUR VIEWPOINTS AND MINDSETS
TO INCREASE HAPPINESS By Keith Garrick
UNREALISTIC COMPARISON CREATES UNHAPPINESS
One very successful scientist who wrote a book about how he came out of depression, said there were two things he had to change in order to decrease his unhappiness with the “gap” between where he thought he was and where he thought he should be:
1. Change the “standard” for you to be happy with where you are so it is not unreachable, so it is more reasonable.
2. Change the underestimation and undervaluation of where you are.
The happiness gap:
Artificially high standard or ideal * Gap 1 | Where you actually are ————— Total gap * Gap 2 | Where you think you are v Where focus attention for greatest payoff? Core Level 2 – Good experiences Level 3 Outside experiences
- Level 1. Internal – The biggest payoff is going to the core: mindset, viewpoint, beliefs, nurturing self
- Level 2. Internal – A good payoff is the stress relievers: meditation , peaceful surroundings, enjoying music. “flow” type of activities
- Level 3. External – Trying to get what you want from outside yourself. In other words, trying to get, and depending on, love from others, approval from others and trying to make the circumstances pleasing to yourself. This is the lowest payoff and is often costly to engage in.
Most people seeking “enlightenment” (which really means they want to get rid of the “heavy weights” of stress and the negatives of life) spend time learning meditation, gathering more (but random) bits of knowledge and philosophy. This is level 2, which is not, by itself, enough. Plus they typically do not “complete” their understanding and implementation!
Trying to get happiness from the outside circumstances is, as most people have heard, fruitless, for happiness is produced from the inside and is most often independent of the circumstances.
The core
For much greater, at least 10 fold, results, concentration on the core is what is needed.
We have grooved into our brain, over and over and over, negative thoughts and evaluations of ourselves. As part of that we are critical of ourselves and treat ourselves worse than we treat anyone else. Instead of treating ourselves as we would our best friend, we talk unkindly to ourselves. We allow negative thoughts to be repeated over and over. And from this, we “evaluate” ourselves to not be in happiness.
If our negative thoughts are what are making us unhappy, when should we change our negative thoughts? Later, relatively soon, or on a top importance urgency?
We should cut to the core and go for where the biggest payoff is: rewriting how we think about things.
BE YOU
