★Resentment is the emotion[&forgiveness=answer]˚

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 16/01/2015. Last edited on 28/04/2016.

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Resentment is the emotion that goes with complaining and the mental labeling of people and adds even more energy to the ego. Resentment means to feel bitter, indignant, aggrieved, or offended. You resent other people’s greed, their dishonesty, their lack of integrity, what they are doing, what they did in the past, what they said, what they failed to do, what they should or shouldn’t have done. The ego loves it. Instead of overlooking unconsciousness in others, you make it into their identity. Who is doing that? The unconsciousness in you, the ego. Sometimes the “fault” that you perceive in another isn’t even there. It is a total misinterpretation, a projection by a mind conditioned to see enemies and to make itself right or superior. At other times, the fault may be there, but by focusing on it, sometimes to the exclusion of everything else, you amplify it. And what you react to in another, you strengthen in yourself. Eckart Tolle

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  ~AsAlwaysAppreciating˚} (:
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  thread in process. Feel free to browse as is. Thank you for your patience while thread is being constructed AsAlwaysAppreciating˚
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˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 16/01/2015. Last edited on 16/04/2015.

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How to Release and Prevent Resentment
The emotions we experience are strong. We feel them intensely and deeply, because they challenge us to reassess the self-image we hold of ourselves.

Letting go of resentment doesn’t necessarily lead to forgiveness, but when you embrace forgiveness, resentment ceases to exist.

to read article in its entirety

_{✰When you hold resentment toward another, you are bound to that person or condition by an emotional link that is stronger than steel. Forgiveness is the only way to dissolve that link and get free. Catherine Ponder}

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 16/01/2015. Last edited on 03/03/2015.

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10 Steps To Letting Go Of Resentment psychologytoday.com

Resentment refers to the mental process of repetitively replaying a feeling, and the events leading up to it, that goads or angers us. We don’t replay a cool litany of facts in resentment; we re-experience and relive them in ways that affect us emotionally, physiologically, and spiritually in very destructive ways. The inability to overcome resentment probably constitutes the single most devastating impediment to repairing a disintegrating intimate connection, family rift, or severed friendship.
to read article in its entirety

_{✰ Sincere forgiveness isn’t colored with expectations that the other person apologize or change. Don’t worry whether or not they finally understand you. Love them and release them. Life feeds back truth to people in its own way and time—just like it does for you and me} ._{Sara Paddison, Hidden Power of the Heart}

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 16/01/2015.

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The incoherence that results from holding on to resentments and unforgiving attitudes keeps you from being aligned with your true self. It can block you from your next level of quality life experience. Metaphorically, it’s the curtain standing between the room you’re living in now and a new room, much larger and full of beautiful objects. The act of forgiveness removes the curtain. Clearing up your old accounts can free up so much energy that you jump right into a whole new house. Forgiving releases you from the punishment of a self-made prison where you are both the inmate and the jailer. _{Doc Childre and Howard Martin, The HeartMath Solution}

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 16/01/2015.

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✰►♥ When we react to life from the head without joining forces with the heart, it can lead us into childish, inelegant behavior that we don’t respect in ourselves. If we get the head in sync with the heart first, we have the power of their teamwork working for us and we can make the changes we know we need to make. _{Doc Childre and Howard Martin, The HeartMath Solution}

_{article from Pickthebrain.com} Try this simple step process I call Face, Embrace, and Erase to transform uncomfortable feelings into peace, love and clarity…for YOU.

Face

Face your feelings. Don’t focus on who made you feel the way you’re feeling, but be aware of your emotions (especially if you expect to redirect them).

If your boat was flooding with water, you’d care about plugging the leak, not who made the hole. Own your feelings. No matter who may have helped you into a negative state, the only one who can change it is you.

Embrace

Embrace your feelings by internally thanking the other person or situation for triggering your emotions.

Sound crazy?

At their core, most people have a fear of not being good enough, or that they aren’t truly loved. But in gratitude there can be no fear. See the other person as your child, or as your child self. Experience what they are feeling.

Instead of focusing on what they did to trigger you, understand how bad they must feel inside to be acting out. It’s really not about you, it’s about them and their internal pain.

Once you thank them for helping you surface deep-rooted feelings, you can diffuse their power by accepting them as a part of you.

Erase

Once you’ve faced and embraced your feelings (and thanked the person who brought them to you), you can lay the rest down. There’s really nothing else to do.
Reaction will only bring more negative energy to the situation. Turning a blind eye is telling yourself you aren’t worthy of more. But facing and embracing can eliminate the worst without any effort from you.

Keeping the focus on you means loving yourself. No one is perfect, and most people do their best with what they have. Love yourself for every thing you do right and every thing you do wrong…because that’s what makes you, YOU. to read more www.pickthebrain.com/blog/youre doing it wrong 3 simple steps to manage anger

site you may like:
“ www.pickthebrain.com “:http://www.pickthebrain.com/blog/

Really great thread! Thank you!

The promise of a larger life and a spirit filled future will require one to give up familiar views and look beyond one self and one’s circumstance.

I will always be deeply touched by the courage of Nelson Mandela when he stood for whats possible so that his community could be reunited. When he was restored to power, he demanded that the warriors who attacked and murdered countless families, women, men , children, Nelson realized that they must come forward, they must tell their complete and entire story, and they must also tell where the bodies are. If they do this, they would not be prosecuted. If they did not tell the entire truth, and did not disclose the location of the bodies, they would be prosecuted. When he first proposed this, many people resisted and said, this is crazy, this will never work—- we will never forgive them and we will never be united and they cannot be trusted! But the people needed time to begin to see what is possible for their community. They did shift their perspective, and they had to give up their position in order to see that healing, and forgiving are possible, and that if they agreed with the process of not prosecuting, ultimately their community could heal and put this painful rampage in the past. These people all knew one another, so this was a huge mandate. They would have to agree to not take revenge, and they would have to agree to the peace process if order for this to work. They had to give up everything: their pain, the need to assign blame and the desire for justice where the murderer got sentenced to jail or to death.

When the process began, several things came to light. As the murderers came forward, and they claimed responsibility for their actions, they began to process the truly horrible things which they had done, and one by one, they all reclaimed their individuality. They were not immediately aware of their terrible burden, and terrible cost of their guilt. some of the murderers had killed people whom they had known their entire life… but when they stood up, and told the truth, they set their burden down. They had ALL had a group identity, and they all felt like they had no choice. They were ordered to perform these killings or they would be killed or their family would be killed. And, as they released this group identity
they reclaimed their individual identity, and one by one, they all cried as they told of every horrible action which they did, and whom they did this to, and where the bodies were buried.

Amazing story of raw courage… and powerful example of what’s possible with forgiveness and being a demand that a community be reunited in order to overcome atrocity.

I’m going to look for some of Nelson’s quotes…

Its an amazing story of what happened. Its beyond what I can imagine, for sure.

Here are a few quotes by Nelson on forgiveness and peace…

“As I walked out the toward my freedom I knew that if I did not leave all the anger, hatred and bitterness behind that I would still be in prison.”

“May your choices reflect your hopes, not your fears.”

“If you want to make peace with your enemy you will have to work with your enemy. Then he will become your partner.”

“For to be free is not merely to cast off ones chains but to live in a way that respects and enhances the freedom of others.”

“Courageous people do not fear forgiving for the sake of peace.”

Lastly: “I am the captain of my soul.”

Meta,
Kathi

There is a typo, oops!

The first quote should say:
“As I walked out toward the door toward my freedom…”

Excellent thread.

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 19/05/2019.

I love that feeling that when you didn't even know you had a resentment, and what was there... goes away lol

We cannot control how people treat us... and I am so amazed how loving ourselves and just continuously doing what is good from a heart place... is a form of forgiveness.

It is like the SERENITY PRAYER and changing what you can(:

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 20/05/2019.

quote: When we know love matters more than anything, and we know that nothing else REALLY matters, we move into the state of surrender. Surrender does not diminish our power, it enhances it.

Sara Paddison { Hidden Power of the Heart }

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 20/05/2019.

quote: Many people are afraid to forgive because they feel they must remember the wrong or they will not learn from it. The opposite is true. Through forgiveness, the wrong is released from its emotional stranglehold on us so that we can learn from it. Through the power and intelligence of the heart, the release of forgiveness brings expanded intelligence to work with the situation more effectively.

David McArthur & Bruce McArthur {The Intelligent Heart }

˚state of wonderful  

Posted on 09/09/2019.

In response to Looking at the flowers's post:

so true! Grudges are such a waste of good energy.

Looking forward to re-rereading this thread. 

Thank you LATF for bringing this thread up(: