★Kids At Heart

I had a very sad experience today, I over heard a head teacher telling 5 pupils (who were around 5 – 7 years of age) off and calling them cowards. My heart just broke into pieces. I just couldnt believe that she was really having a go at them. I was in the office writing out some cheques for my kids photos, the teacher and 5 pupils were outside the office, she was aware of me been inside as I had to walk past them to get to the office, she really had a go at them. Those poor kids. They did do some mischief at lunch time, eating feigoes from a neighbouring property, which to my knowledge was overhanging onto school grounds anyway and they were caught writing on walls. To call them cowards was nasty. She also asked the kids to repeat the word again! Im sitting still in the waiting room not knowing what to do, I couldnt even look at her in her face, I feel so angry with myself I didnt do anything to her when she was having a go at the boys. My heart beating so fast when she walked past me, thou the thoughts coming through my head was what if that was one of my kids, would my kids tell me that a teacher called them a coward, no Im sure they wouldnt of, and also would the teacher tell me that she called them a coward, no of course not! I got really angry and spoke to the office ladys and stated that if any one of my children gets into trouble at school, I would appreicate that they not get called a coward and labelling a child and asking them to repeat the word sure does damage to their thoughts. I am still in shock, those poor kids.

I also said to the office ladys I understand that they did something they werent meant too, thou eating feigoes isnt really a problem for goodness sake but calling them that word or any other word is just not on!

The teachers punishment for the boys tomorrow is that they are to go without morning tea and lunch. I think I will take this up with the Prinipal tomorrow. I am sure my message would have got word to the Head Teacher, just waiting for confrontation from her, which I am ready for completely.

It’s so hard to not judge this teacher. I am in complete agreement with you that what she did was wrong and she abused her power by reprimanding them in such a away.
just as a teacher myself I have to wonder where she is coming from?? I truly hope that she gets to speak her side and then create strategies to overcome her stress so this doesn’t happen again.
I have to admit that sometimes, after I have walked away from a moment of behaviour management (discipline is such a strong word, i don’t like it) i wonder if i went over the top, or let other stresses from the day, or in general, effect my attitude to what the children were doing right then and there. which is all they know! the kids don’t know that the teacher’s partner is breaking up with her, or that her loan repayments are late, yet they cop it. it’s really sad when you see this kind of situation happen again and again from teachers that are overworked and not in the moment with the kids.

sorry for the rant, got home late from work and venting about other staff.

I cant understand why she called them cowards to be honest. surely cowardly behaviour is more descriptive of bulling not eating fruit of a tree and writing on walls. They should of course have been told to clean the wall if possible and be sent round to the house where the feigos where growing. Its bad enough calling them cowards but to make them repeat it is unforgivable when these kids are older theyl probably act in cowardly ways and it will all stem back to what that teacher said. Iv said things to my daughter in anger which I shouldnt of but I never made her repeat it and Iv applogised when iv calmed down, besides this woman is suppose to be a proffesional shes not doing her job very well.

Thankyou Mel and Best78 for your comments, I find it hard not to judge her either, I have put myself in her shoes and I feel for her, she has so many children to attend to, 5 days a week, 9am to 3pm, my heart went out to her. She must be going through some hard times. I have known of her for 3 years now, she adores all the children, she speaks very highly of them when we have prize givings, she knows each and every childs name, she is nice, she doesnt have children of her own cause she feels that all the school children are all hers. I think that is kinda sweet. I attended quite a few Parent and School Partnership with her over the years, where we encouraged positive talk etc etc, I learnt alot, and admired her, I was really wrapt to hear that one of my daughters had her as a teacher a couple of years ago, Sara was a high student.

I just got a shock in what she said and the way she said it, I have never heard her say that before, it just didnt sound like her. I am sure thou that afterwards she would have felt bad aye? After maybe having some quality time at home later she would have thought about the situation and maybe change her ways towards the kids today? I hope so.

I didnt get a chance to go in today, I got tied up here at home, I dont think I was meant to go, I really didn’t like the idea of going into the principal, as I had an experience with a teacher from another school who went up towards the Board of Trustees, he was having problems at home, he got quite aggressive towards my son, he is still working at that school.

Back to this teacher, I have a feeling a lesson has been learnt and words of any nature will not be spoken again from her. The school knows a parent overheard a teacher speak harshly and to them that is not a good, I think it is taken seriously aye?

MY heart is with the boys, they are too little to understand the adult world of emotions and stress, they are all new to these experiences, they see us as role models, they look up to us, alot of nasty words is always spoken to kids, it does damage, real damage, gosh look we are now, making up positive affirmations to cover the hurts and pain others have inflicted upon us when we were kids and still we are hearing these words in our adult life. It is so sad. When is it ever going to stop?!

I hope she did apologise to the children today and I hope she did give them something to eat for morning tea and lunch, kids need food. I agree they should have been told to clean the wall and sent around to the house too maybe even suggest they each take a bag of feigoes to repay the ones they had eaten.

I hope she brought it up with the parents of the boys, not nice if she didnt, I wouldnt like to be kept in the dark if any one of my kids played up at school.

Having read your 2nd thread I feel perhaps I judged this teacher too harshly.
I assumed that she was just a naturaly strict and hard person but obviously she was acting out of character. I guess thats why it was such a shock to hear her speak like that. I know when im stressed if sophie (my daughter) is playing up I dont always deal with her behaviour appropriately and as this teacher sees the children as her own I guess she was making the same mistake.

The folk who take responsibility for teaching our youth are to be respected and honored. It’s a difficult and irksome task, I’m sure.

Having been a scout leader for nearly 2 decades I know that it’s difficult to influence behaviors if they are not set straight at home, before they go outside to see ‘the world’.

I’m not condoning the teacher’s behavior, but I understand it. My prayer is that she does go back to the children and set things straight. There’s a fabulous lesson for the children in that she was upset and said things that were hurtful, and perhaps she would have been able to communicate her frustration in a kinder and gentler way.

Yes I agree too, it all seams from the home, I understand completely. I know with my 5 kids they do test me every day, my little ones are 7, 6, 5 and 4. My teenager is testing too, which is to be expected. Its hard work been a parent, I understand it very hard to be a teacher as well. A couple of my children decided not to listen to me when I asked them to come inside for a bath, one of them decided to turn on the hose and had a ball of a time wetting the others. I wasnt happy that they didnt listen to me thou I kept my cool, I said a few words of encouragement and pointed out that it was getting cold and late and they came inside where I spoke calmly to them and explained that listening is very important, and that since they listen to the teacher at school, it would be nice if they could listen at home. It goes part n parcel.

I hope things went well today at school for the teacher and boys today, I would like to send many wishes for everyone at school tomorrow, may their day and days ahead be filled with fun and laughter.

In response to ThisIsBruce’s post:
And what a learning experience for the teacher also! There are too few people in this world who are able to admit when they were wrong or hurt somebody, and this has created a cycle of children and adults who struggle to accept feelings of hurt or frustration. If she goes back to these children and apologises for going over the top I commend her. It shows the children a great lesson in making things right and will hopefully stand out to them as a moment they can learn from

alas to say the teacher feels no remorse for what she said to the boys, she feels she did nothing wrong in her approach in dealing with them. She told me that she did not label them as cowards, she said she was merely pointing out to them what cowards are. Im sorry but that is not to be true, she was yelling at them calling them cowards, she done so repeatedly, she denies ever saying to the children to repeat what she said they were too.

The conversation came up as my youngest boy was told to sit with his mates outside the office at lunchtime today because they were playing gun games. I wasnt aware of it only till I came to pick up at school. My girls told me what happened and said it was the head teacher who told the boys to go there, I got very nervious and upon seeing her I asked what happened and mentioned that I hope my son wasnt labelled harshly for something that was so minor, she got defensive with me and made excuses to justify her actions. She doesnt like me very much now and gave me evil looks when she walked away.

I feel I had to say something, to bring it to the attention, to me this is serious, I cant let this slip. I want my kids to be in a safe environment. She has made me feel guilty too for some reason, maybe her way of manulating me into thinking I overheard wrong? I shouldnt let her get to me, I know what I heard. Affirmation: Im a Mum that likes to know what goes on at school with my kids, the good and the bad, so much effort has been put into raising my kids in a positive environment and I would love people to respect my wants and desires.

Please forgive my rabblings.

In response to Pure Essence’s post:
I’m sorry but I’m going to have to start judging this teacher. she seems really unaware of the consequences of her actions.
((((hugs))))) for you Pure Essence. I can’t imagine how as a mother you are feeling that this teacher, this woman, this human! is interacting with your children in this way. I’m sure that as well as your progress through this, that you conscious effort to bring your children up wisely and thoughtfully will also assist them in moving beyond the effects of this teacher.

In response to melt86’s post:

Big Hugs to you Mel, thankyou so much for your words of comfort and support. I havent been able to stop thinking about it, Ive been trying to see where I went wrong in the situation with her today cause this guilty issue keeps coming up, I cant see why it is, so I think its all about her. I think I caught her off guard that day, saw her colours maybe and she doesnt like that she got sprung. Ive lost my respect for her now.

I wish my children had you as a teacher Mel! Your pupils are truely blessed to have you as a positive role model in their lives.

solar serinity